I’m sick of it. It’s not really doing anything for me. The word ‘revolution’ is not on anyone’s lips anymore. Why? because you can get your favorite tv show on dvd? Bravo, now you’re fulfilled. Stop being satisfied, start being dissatisfied. The current system is outdated, barbaric, cruel, inhuman. Love thy brother, hate begets hate, evil begets evil. Our problems started with order, not disorder, and humanity is not yet created. Let’s not forget the real purpose of life, that purpose is change. The status quo is terrible, we live in obscene times, we warship war. We think hate is good, hate will bring us peace, well it wont. We are sick, we are immature, let’s get it together people. It’s time for a new system, and, despite that I’m being monitored by the NSA, the word ‘revolution’ is on my lips. Fuck the establishment, having a vote between slave masters, doesn’t eliminate the system of masters and slaves.

We have to be blatant, I’m done dancing around the subject.
My name is Andrew

Right now I feel an ominous sense of doom. This country is screwed, the world is screwed, we’re in for one hell of a century. Where to begin? Global warming is melting the ice-caps faster than anyone expected. Sea levels are going to rise fast. We’re running out of oil and we don’t have a good alternative to take its place. energy prices are rising and they’re only going to get worse, especially because of new demand from China. America is in an enormous amount of debt and we have no way of paying it off any time soon. The government is slowly but surely eliminating our civil liberties. There is a ton of animosity towards this country all over the world. And we’re in a quagmire in Iraq that wont end for a looong time.

So let’s sum up: loosing the major source of energy, loosing a ton of land on which to live (due to rising sea levels), loosing our rights, loosing our economy, and being engaged in a perpetual war. Yes it’s easy for one to get depressed in the face of all this, I feel like I should encourage people to be optimistic, but right now I don’t feel very optimistic. Then again, the only possible way to get ourselves out of any of these predicaments is to get off our lazy asses and do it ourselves. A good place to start is WeAreGod.org since getting people to stand up and do something is exactly what they’re all about. The world is in a bad place, we must do something about it!

There exist two opposing states: existence, in all of its unlimited possibility; and nothingness. All of existence comes from the nothingness.

In our struggle to come to terms with our own existence and that which exists in context, we can easily see our observations, emotions and the day to day occurrences themselves as having some greater meaning, fitting into some pre-existing patchwork explaining everything. Many people find this meaning in religious teachings, and many other people piece together a meaning of their own from an ever expanding and increasingly easy to access collection of human knowledge (the internet, books, etc).

What makes us Human and different from other animals is the written and spoken language, which allows us to communicate to each other, among other things, these far reaching and personally significant meanings in and of life. Part of that requires these meanings and statements of value, retellings of experience or emotions to take on greater significance and weight, thus having the effect of making the words themselves more real than the existence or experience itself. This is the point at which people’s words effect each other very easily, when language used triggers memories and seeming relevencies that allow the listener or reader to feel a shared sense of whatever is being described. What many people do not keep in mind is that the words used are not the experience, nor are they the existence.

When we observe the “outside world”, we look for what we can recognize or make sense of. By contrast, what we cannot recognize or make sense of can hardly be observed at all in that we do not possess he experiences that would allow for the recognition of significance to occur. Thus, when new things happen (as they do every day), it is decidedly easier to attribute them to an imagined pattern or see them as part of a series of events. This is not incorrect, it is a part of what makes us and allows us to be human. But the recognition of the pattern is an act of creation out of nothingness, just like the use of language to describe meaning.

This can be likened to the drawing of complex patterns or geometric structures on graph paper. What exists is the graph paper, and on it we impose patterns that we “see”. By “seeing” the pattern, and especially by drawing it, we are participating in the act of creation by pulling something out of the nothingness. Infinite possibilities of patterns or non-patterns can be imposed upon a sheet of graph paper, but ultimately what exists is the grid and the imagination that sees designs in the grid, connecting the dots and lines as a mirror like expression of itself.

There is a voice in my head, very familiar, that will wait for the right moment and then say the one thing that could make me feel possibly worse than I already do. It is the voice that reminds me about all the guys my girlfriend has hooked up with before me and how uncomfortable I am with that, it is the voice that brings up how upset I am about my living situation, and it is the voice that looks for ways to give me that completely and sickeningly satisfying rush of negative emotion. It makes me want to wallow in sadness, anger, and frustration. That wallowing is so familiar, so comfortable to me, that unless I recognize it and halt the process, it will be more immediately satisfying than trying to feel good in any way.

This voice is the voice of dirt, disgust, and blackness. It comes out of mounds of cigarette butts and empty bottles and cans, shit, piss, and vomit, interpersonal conflict, misogyny, violence, delusion, and all sickness and darkness. It is like a black hole that I’m constantly being sucked into, a little at a time, and sometimes I pull myself away from it and feel better, but that shit is a vacuum and unless I keep fighting it, I’ll eventually get sucked in all the way.

This is my hell. Sometimes. And other times it is a distant and bleak reality, a possibility that has been explored and somewhat understood, and I choose not to be enveloped.

My question is, What is that? Where does it come from? Why is it there? What is it about existence, or my existence, that necessarily includes a self destructive, negative tract or aspect?

I guess I already know the answer. But then I think that the answer will come to me after further contemplation. And finally I think, this is just part of life. Awareness of one’s emotional zero point and all that it consists of, the worst thing imaginable. In that for me this thing is imaginable, I imagine it, and am therefore conscious of it. BUT WHERE THE FUCK DOES IT COME FROM?

Top-down brain function refers to the ability of higher functions of the brain being able to control/ effect the lower functions of our brain.

This is probably the easiest way to distinguish why humans are fundamentally different then animals in terms of brain function. Animals in general are almost entirely slaves to classical conditioning. The environment effects them, they produce conditioned responses to their environment based on need and that is pretty much the end of it. Humans, while still very much susceptible to conditioning, as is seen particularly in casinos that condition people with constant positive reinforcement by displaying people winning money, yet we are not entirely slaves to our environment. Humans have the ability to use higher brain functions as a way of potentially determining what they want to do with the environmental information they receive. In addition to this we have the ability to use our brains to entirely create totally internal conditioning processes. This higher brain function is what allows us in the end to shape our minds (with a few restrictions perhaps) into what we want them to be.

Commonly referred to as metaprograming this process is the essential process to human progress in the future. The only problem with this process is that it requires a tremendous amount of discipline to take full advantages of such features of our brain. Because of this I believe that next step in intelligent evolution revolves around this concept. The next step being that of our brain becoming more susceptible to internal conditioning making it easier for a brain to mold itself quickly and effectively.

These types of recursive processes is what is essential in the universe. The advent of the ability for an object to learn and eventually change the very nature of itself seems to be in some way or another to be the purpose of existence and even suggests that anything, large or small could gain this ability or has some intrinsic ability to do this already. Perhaps this is the essence of will or even the essence of the universe.

More study on this is needed for sure.