There are two exclusive possibilities at this point:

1) stay with girl. have dependable relationship. have love when it cannot be found anywhere else. remain closed off to other possibilities.

2) break up with girl. enter uncertain world of greater possibilities. open myself up more to the school that I am attending.

i went back and forth on this for a long time, then finally settled into being comfortable in the relationship. however, the thought came up again yesterday while we were together. I haven’t been able to shake it.

is the fact that I am still going back and forth enough to make change happen?

I like the comfort that this relationship provides, but when I think about the future in any regard, I get scared about the possibility of still being in this position, not having let things change with time.

What is the taoist approach to this? I’ve been trying to decide.

THE NEXT DAY-

I think I have decided what the taoist approach is, and I agree with it. The answer is to practice not doing, to be patient, like eternity, and allow events to take their course. I must remember these things! I think it’s funny upon reflection that I continually go in and out of accordance with the Tao. I think I do it subconsciously, just so that I can be satisfied again and again by the wisdom of the Tao. It replenishes me, I forget about it or am distracted from it, then I use it to get myself out of depression and angst. It works every time.

once i saw the path
i am on it till the end
which is not
also beginning
at the end

Is the universe justified?

According to most theology the world is only justified if it is seen as right in the eyes of God.

But what if the universe is inherently justified in itself? How then could we say that certain things in a justified universe were un-just? Can certain objects of a unified “good” whole be “bad”? no they must all have equal weight in the whole since the whole cannot exist without them. And since the whole is justified then nothing contained within the whole can be distinguished as un-just.

So how can the universe be justified?

It seems that things that happen within the world are unjustified, “evil” BAD. So since these things exist can’t we conclude that the universe is inherently unjustified? and that as a cause everything within the universe is unjustified? So then why does the universe exist?

It seems that a universe that has no justification should have no reason to exist.

These are all interesting problems that God easily solves. This is why many people perceive God as too easy an answer and dismiss the idea of theology. I’ll even admit to doing this myself but only because I like asking these questions too much. And believing in God obviously doesn’t allow you to ask these questions… Because God hates people who think and rains down justice on those who try.

After you first lose sight of your goals there is uncertain amount of time before they come back to you.
There are a couple of different ways to reflect on this.
At first thought, I felt undisciplined because it was not a high priority of mine to keep a constant awareness of my goals, but soon there after I realized that my reflections were not correctly focused. The time of awareness of goals is not as important as the time in between the awareness of them. You can’t achieve goals while concentrating on prioritizing your goals. It is the time in between that is worth reflecting on because it is a more accurate judge of hoe you actually live your life.
It is something when you achieve your goals without the conciouse awareness of them.
The cycle that my life is attuned to left I’d say 2 weeks inbetween the last time I was hyper aware of my goals and the time of this post. In that time, I have lived closer to my ideal than ever before. Far from perfect, but it leaves plenty to work on during my next cycle. And the best part about it is that I don’t even have to do anything. I just have to live my life and hope that my training has been and will be positive.
Some times are meant for reflection, some are meant to plan for the future, but most are to be lived in the present. I gotta say, all three are pretty damned neat.