Separating
When is reason a better guide than the heart?
My heart is still with my someone I love, but my reason is telling me to separate myself from her. My heart wants all of her and my reason wants none of her. Nothing in between seems to work. A friendship only depresses me. Why should I limit my relationship with someone I love to a friendship?
Since we cannot be together, the other end of the spectrum is to cut myself off from her. It’s really too bad that it has to be all or nothing, but I think it is the only way to avoid feeling shitty. It becomes all the worse because what I want affects her which comes back to affect me, so it becomes really hard to be completely honest and open without coming off as harsh and insensitive.
The real dilemma is that I don’t want to cut myself off. I also don’t want to be with her. I also don’t want to be friends. Breaking up is hard to do!! I’m stuck it a Catch 22. So what else is new on this blog?
Anyway life is good. I’m on top in all other departments. I got 99 solutions but a bitch ain’t one.
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if she can be a friend and be a positive force in your life, it would seem wise to try.
Comment by reverend gisher — On 12-02-05 at 6:05 pm
thanks man, i am feeling better about the situation since i wrote this. I feel less closed off. That’s really what this blog is good for.
Comment by poop in my pants — On 12-02-05 at 7:24 pm
yeah man i use it all the time like that. I am often reassured that we all are in fact one person going through all the exact same shit just at different times.
by the way, yoga + going to the gym + playing basketball RULES.
Comment by flaxy — On 12-02-05 at 11:14 pm